I hope someday this pain will make sense to to you.
I know what I've put you through. I've made you thump so fast at every little thing he did. I've made you endure so much pain so many times. I knew you were getting weak and tired but I didn't stop.
I knew it all but i chose him over you. I prioritized him over you. Even though it is you who keeps me alive, the one who continuously pumps blood to every corner of my body so I could go about my daily life.
You beat for me and only for me. Yet, I chose the one who never once had his heart beat for me.
I'm sorry. I don't know what to say outside of I'm sorry.
I know... I see how broken you are. All these pieces scattered all over.
I will give you time to bleed and grieve and when you are ready, I will try my best to look for every piece and put you all back together again.
I don't know if I ever will. It's always hard to find pieces of broken you.
But whatever piece I find, I promise to put it right back in its place and make you as whole as I can.
But for now, let us grieve, cry and be angry. You deserve it. You deserve the space, the tears and the anger after everything I've put you through.
I'll be paitent and I'll wait until your anger turns to logic and you start to understand just what the pain was for.