Dear to 50-Year-Old Me


Dear 50 Years Old Me,

I just finished writing a script. It is almost 12 midnight and although most people are either out on a gimik with their friends or home resting, I am, as usual, still at the office. I’m a little drained from writing so it’s a choice between walking the streets of Ayala to pick a fight with the next call center agent with an irritatingly alien accent and bad grammar or blogging. I choose blogging – a letter to the future me.

How are you? You’re 50 by now. Wow, that’s old. You must be overweight by now. Well, you always have been. But that shouldn’t matter if you are happy? Are you? Am I making the right decisions now to make your life worth living.

Have you been to other countries? Are you living in another country? Do you still love traveling? Were you able to keep the dreams and passions I have? Or has life force you to go easy and submit to what you have and forget about what you can possibly have?

I love traveling, you know? I do it as often as I could because it's a beautiful world. I love seining faces of strangers walking in a strange land doing things I have never seen. I love figuring them out. It's amazing how we are all structurally the same but essentially different. I hope you don't let those memories become fainter and fainter. And I hope you don't lose that passion. Don’t worry, I will make sure to print all the pictures in all of my travels. Have you walked the streets of Paris? Personally saw the ceiling of the Vatican? Explored the jungles of Australia?

Are you still in Advertising? Are you still writing movies? I love writing. I love creating characters and see them grow on their own, watch them make mistakes and try to correct them. They don't always succeed but it is heartwarming to see them try. I love it when stories come into full circle or disintegrate into chaotic beauty. Have you kept that love?

I want to write a novel. Have you done that yet? I wanted to publish my own comic book. Have you done that yet? Were you able to fulfill your dreams of becoming a superheor? Were you able to expose yourself to deadly radiation to develop any sort of superpower? I want to be a strip dancer in Las Vegas. Have you done that yet?

At this point, I can’t even guess what you are doing. I am sort of starting to not enjoy what I do. Life is too short to get stuck doing something I don’t really enjoy anymore. I would be happier if you spend your time by the beach everyday with the people that you love. That's what I call life. I hope your life now gives you more time for yourself and for the people who matter to you. Right now, I don't have time for myself and for the people that I love. I rarely see Mom and Dad. It’s been some time since I had a really fun day with Marrione. I see my friends only when there are special occasions and even that is not consistent. I hope you don't live this kind of life anymore. I am not happy. I hope you are.

I hope you are mature in your ways by now. Stop comparing people to insects. It's not funny. What? You think you're pretty? I am not and you're 50. You must be really ugly.

How is Mommy at Daddy? Are you taking care of them? They’d be older by now so I expect they're crazier. Be patient with them as they were with you when you were still a struggling Neanderthal. They taught you how to read, write, walk, and laugh and those are the things that made you survive this beautiful world of ours. How is Marrione? Is she married now? I hope you helped her become a happy and honest person.

How many children do you have? That is, if you have any. I sort of promised myself that I will have at least one kid within the next five years – biologically or otherwise. I hope you have more than one though. Are you an insane mother? Do your best for your children to not be like you. If they are biological, they are most likely ugly like me. So, strive to make them smart. Imagine their life if they are ugly and stupid. They should at least be able to multiply and divide.

Are you married? Annulled? Divorced? Dead?

More importantly, I hope you still pray a lot. I am not sure who or what He, She or It is but I am certain that belief in Higher Power is necessary. I hope you don't lose that faith I have in love. It is the only towards happiness.


Your Younger Self

Posted on 2013-01-14 21:03:40 by MatandangDalaga  

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